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Top 10 Funny Book Quotes

Top 10 Menhirs!

Top Ten Tuesday is a meme hosted at That Artsy Reader Girl. Every Tuesday, you pick ten books on that week’s topic. This week’s topic was book quotes by any theme. I’m choosing to go with some of the funny book quotes. Because laughter is the best medicine, you know.

1 / Sourcery by Terry Pratchett

“I’m not going to ride on a magic carpet!” he hissed. “I’m afraid of grounds.”
“You mean heights, said Conina. “And stop being silly.”
“I know what I mean! It’s the grounds that kill you.”

2 / The Savage Damsel and the Dwarf by Gerald Morris

“Don’t make yourself so special,” the dwarf said with a snort. “As if getting lost was some trick that only women knew. I’ve known men who could get lost in their own bedrooms. The only difference is that men with no sense of direction don’t brag about it, the way women do.”

3 / Shit, Actually by Lindy West

About Jurassic Park (the movie):
“The T. rex gets out. The lawyer tries to hide in a toilet house, but T. rex finds him immediately because this is the 1990s, so T. rexes hate lawyers.”

4 / Catch-22 by Joseph Heller

“Some men are born mediocre, some men achieve mediocrity, and some men have mediocrity thrust upon them. With Major Major it had been all three. Even among men lacking all distinction he inevitably stood out as a man lacking more distinction than all the rest, and people who met him were always impressed by how unimpressive he was.”

5 / The Importance of Being Earnest by Oscar Wilde

“I never travel without my diary. One should always have something sensational to read in the train.”

6 / Insults from Shakespeare
7 / The Code of the Woosters by P.G. Wodehouse

‘There are moments, Jeeves, when one asks oneself, ‘Do trousers matter?’
‘The mood will pass, sir.’

8 / The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy by Douglas Adams

For a moment, nothing happened. Then, after a second or so, nothing continued to happen.

9 / Not Much Fun: The Lost Poems of Dorothy Parker

“To me, the most beautiful word in the English language is cellar-door. Isn’t it wonderful? The ones I like, though, are ‘cheque’ and ‘enclosed’.”

10 / Naked by David Sedaris

“I haven’t the slightest idea how to change people, but still I keep a long list of prospective candidates just in case I should ever figure it out.” …. “It had nothing to do with changing people— forget that, on a good day you’re lucky if you can talk someone into changing their socks.”

Do you have any other funny book quotes in mind? Which ones would you recommend? Always happy to get fresh #Funnies recommendations! 😀

49 replies on “Top 10 Funny Book Quotes”

Do you know, I’ve only watched the movie till date? My quote choice was based on the movie — but as per fans, the movie was pretty bad. Haha

I’ve never read the book either. Actually started it once but got sidetracked. Isn’t that weird? Everyone loves the books haha. I need to retry…

I love these! The Wodehouse quote is the one that stood out the most – probably because that has been a question I’ve asked myself every morning for the entire past year. The mood has yet to pass.

Nice focus! I love the format you chose…it almost seems like you’re reading a real novel!

When I think of book quotes that make me laugh, Erynn Magnum’s books definitely come to mind. She’s not a well known author but I love all of her work and it never fails to make me smile. I also like humor that anticipates what the audience thinks and adds a teeny twist…the Hitchhiker one is a great example of that!

My post: https://steppingstonesbookreviews.blogspot.com/2021/05/top-ten-tuesday-first-blogiversary-top.html?m=1

Erynn Magnum – that’s a name I’ve never heard before. I find good humorous writing to be so rare, I’m always up for new recs. Thanks so much for visiting and sharing!

Aww, another person who loved the Shakespeare slurs! My friend had a whole magnet collection from the London museum, it made me so jealous ;-D

Hi Anne. Read your post on the tree quotes, it was heart-warming, especially the one from Anne Shirley. 🙂 I’ve heard of Confederacy of Dunces, hope it doesn’t have a (too) tragic ending, will give it a try then!

Oh, I love collecting / reading quotes. <3 For Sedaris, a lot of people recommend starting with "The Best of Me". Might want to start there the next time you want some snarky fun!

Love Dave Sedaris’s writing so much, he is endless quotable. And I’ve been meaning to get Sh*t, Actually for awhile- Jurassic Park is one of my all time favorite movies, and the author isn’t wrong, lawyer jokes were IN in the 90’s!

All true. Lindy West was such an amazing discovery for me this year. I died laughing through her commentary. It’s such a new (and accurate) way of looking at movies and their really crazy manoeuvres.

I had a great time compiling these quotes. Humor is what I go back to every time I need some feel good — so this TTT was the perfect opportunity! 😀

That would have been so cool. I think in the coming weeks, one of the TTT topics is a freebie — maybe you pick it up then? *hopeful look*

Haha… these are fun. Loved seeing a David Sedaris quote. I haven’t read him in a while but his books are hilarious. I was lucky enough to see him at a book reading/signing once and he’s just so funny.

Wow, you’ve seen him at a book event! I’ve only just started reading his books and I couldn’t stop chortling/ giggling for hours afterwards.

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